Thoughts on Sex (in books)

Hey everyone! Another weekend blog. A new month to a new year. We finished the first full week of January 2021.

Let’s not talk about it. Let’s just not go there at all.

In the effort of not talking about the first week of 2021, I am, instead, going to express my feelings about SEX (in books). Why am I talking about this? I don’t rightfully know. It’s a topic, I want to write about it. I’m not even sure if this blog will have a point. I’m just going with the flow.

Where to start? Well, my general information about this topic…

  1. I read sex in books.
  2. I don’t need sex in books to enjoy them.
  3. I write sex in books.

Let’s start with point 1 and 2. I don’t need sex in books to enjoy them, but I do read them. And that’s pretty much as simple as it sounds. I am not that type of reader who needs that pay off in every single story. Do I sometimes desperately wish a story would pay off once the doors close? Yes, but that’s not something I hold against the book or the author or would rate anything lower for. I read Dark Hunters then I jump over and read Kushiel’s Legacy, then Black Jewels. But I also read YA, much of which has no sex on page. I also read a variety of UF, much of which has no sex on page. (Notice I say ‘much of which’ because of these genres can and do have sex in places to varying degrees of steam levels and detail).

And knowing my preference (or lack thereof because I don’t care most of the time) for sex in books, let’s talk about it in my books.

So when I’m writing if a sex scene doesn’t fit for the plot, the pacing, or the tone of the scene, I don’t write it and let it fade to black. If a sex scene fits or needs to happen for some reason, I write it. That’s pretty much how it goes for me.

Because I don’t commit to writing hot and steamy romances, I hear about it. One of my most popular series often gets comments “I wish there was more steam, there’s not enough for this to be in such and such genre.”

Then, because I write sex at all (even just 1 scene 4 books into a series), I get “oh, it’s another porno.”

Such an odd place to find myself and I’m 100% certain other authors find themselves in this place as well.

But I love what I write and just know, that any and all sex complaints from either side of it go straight into the dumpster that stays in the back of my brain and then is promptly data dumped.

I don’t think sex inherently makes a romance (epics, urban fantasy, horror can and do all have sex in them on occasion). I don’t think romance inherently needs sex (romance without sex is an actual thing). I don’t think sex makes a book worse in all examples, nor do I think it makes a better in all examples. Honestly, I wrote a guy who was being eaten alive by ants in the Amazon once and it’s never been mentioned to me. I write people getting their heads cut off, cut in half, and losing limbs. I’ve written people getting maimed disfigured. No one comes after me for gratuitous violence (and my books can get incredibly violent).

So my thoughts on sex?

I’m going to keep doing me and writing my books how I want. And I’m going to keep enjoying books at the face value of how other authors write them. Sex, no sex. I don’t really care.

And before anyone asks “Why are you talking about this?”, let’s go back to the beginning of this blog. It was either this or the first week of 2021 in review.

And I will not, under any circumstances, be reviewing the first week of 2021.